Today is day five of the March photo challenge!

always smiling!

You should join the challenge!

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The other day I posted this amazing piece of writing by Sonny Carroll titled The Awakening. It is lengthy so I understand if it was missed or skimmed, but I encourage you to take the time--when you truly have the time--to read it. I was, and still am deeply moved by the wisdom, and in all honesty was hit square in the face with my awakening. While I connect with several sentences and paragraphs, I realize the many areas I am lacking and understand I have so much [more] to learn in this life before I am remotely close to being in that overall stage of life.

I read this very post about a year ago and it didn't seem to strike a chord within me as it did last week. Last week was a emotional week, and three things hit me hard:

A specific scene from an episode of Sex and the City
Lifting Your Eyes Off The Weeds, by Max Lucado, and
The Awakening, by Sonny Carroll

I caught this episode one night last week (gotta love those reruns!):



I have always been the person everyone goes to, to vent, talk things out, gain perspective, a shoulder to cry on, get advice, etc. I have also had the same phone number for over 10 years, and my friends know it will ALWAYS be on and no matter what time it is, I will answer (drives the boyfriend nuts!).

That being said, I am guilty for saying the exact same thing Miranda said to Carrie (1:17 - 1:26) to one of my friends. I was fed up with this friend crying over her "Mr. Big" and interminably going back to him.

I am also guilty of what Carrie accuses Miranda of: "writing people off" - I have always referred to this as the light switch, that can be turned on or off, and in my past (and probably now..) it was "easy" for me to write people off. When people crossed a line with me, I was done.

And finally, another thing I do that Miranda did in this scene is: walk away. 

It is more often with my close family, those I love most and drive me crazy. In arguments or times where I am boiling over, I find myself lost for words or so overwhelmed with emotions all I can do is walk away. 

While reading this:

It’s so easy to be ungrateful—to make the mistake my friend’s caddie made. 

Scott’s a professional golfer who plays at the Masters Golf Tournament hosted by the Augusta National Golf Club. The Augusta National is to golfers what the Smithsonian is to history buffs: the ultimate experience! You’d think you walked into an oil painting. Groomers manicure that course as if she’s a wedding-day bride. 

Scott said, “You won’t see a single weed all week!” 

Imagine Scott’s surprise when his caddie announced, “I found one!” 

Don’t we do the same? We walk in a garden of grace. God’s love sprouts around us like lilacs—but we go on weed hunts. How many flowers do we miss in the process? 

Lift your eyes off the weeds. Collect your blessings—His kindnesses. 

Assemble your reasons for gratitude. And choose to make every day—a great day!

I couldn't help but read between the lines. Maybe Carrie was right (1:30~). To top it off, I think I'm Scott's Caddie! How many flowers have I missed while spotting weeds? No one is perfect, and we all need encouragement - which I know - so why am I so tough all the time?

Unconditional love is so important, and we are so lucky to have it. While I may be strong and stubborn, I am equally sensitive and care for every person I am blessed to have in my life, and don't want to lose them because I fail to lift my eyes off the weeds.

I think it is safe to say the last three months have been an emotional toll on my family, and last week some things came to a head between my Mom and I. We had a heart wrenching fight that ended in fiercely hot tears.

One of the toughest things [for me] in life so far has been letting go. Speechless Sunday #11 is probably one of my favorites because to me that photo is priceless and that song is timeless.. Isn't it wonderful how you can read or listen to something one day and interpret it this way -- then -- read or listen to it another day and interpret it a different way -- all because of where we are in life. 

Lately I have observed the Lord blatantly orchestrating my life, and I respectfully fear His authority, but also rejoice in His direction. He is my wonderful Counselor, and His love endures forever.

I have to consciously remember to surrender it all to Him, and never stop praying. Too often I get caught up in the "I can do it myself" frame of mind, when in reality who wouldn't want His guidance?

PS: I wanted to let you all know in case you missed this post on facebook -- last week's doctor's appointments revealed good news of progression in the right direction. My Dad will have another CT scan in 3-months, and we're hoping for even better results. With permission, I will be sharing more details in future posts. Until then, please know all your prayers are appreciated and are with out a doubt being heard! We are so thankful for our Prayer Warriors, it means so much to us! Thank you Lord!! ♥

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I could not have written this better, so with that thought in mind, I’d like to present something wonderful that I am posting from writer Sonny Carroll...



A time comes in your life when you finally get it…when, in the midst of all your fears and insanity, you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out…ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying and blaming and struggling to hold on.

Then, like a child quieting down after a tantrum, you blink back your tears and begin to look at the world through new eyes.

This is your awakening.

You realize it’s time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to magically appear over the next horizon. You realize that in the real world there aren’t always fairy tale endings, and that any guarantee of “happily ever after” must begin with you… and in the process a sense of serenity is born of acceptance.

You awaken to the fact that you are not perfect and that not everyone will always love, appreciate or approve of who or what you are… and that’s OK. They are entitled to their own views and opinions.

You learn the importance of loving and championing yourself… and in the process a sense of new found confidence is born of self-approval. You stop complaining and blaming other people for the things they did to you – or didn’t do for you – and you learn that the only thing you can really count on is the unexpected.

You learn that people don’t always say what they mean or mean what they say and that not everyone will always be there for you and that everything isn’t always about you.

So, you learn to stand on your own and to take care of yourself… and in the process a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.

You stop judging and pointing fingers and you begin to accept people as they are and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties… and in the process a sense of peace and contentment is born of forgiveness.

You learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. You begin reassessing and redefining who you are and what you really stand for.

You learn the difference between wanting and needing and you begin to discard the doctrines and values you’ve outgrown, or should never have bought into to begin with.

You learn that there is power and glory in creating and contributing and you stop maneuvering through life merely as a “consumer” looking for your next fix.

You learn that principles such as honesty and integrity are not the outdated ideals of a bygone era, but the mortar that holds together the foundation upon which you must build a life.

You learn that you don’t know everything, it’s not your job to save the world and that you can’t teach a pig to sing. You learn that the only cross to bear is the one you choose to carry and that martyrs get burned at the stake.

Then you learn about love. You learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as you would have them be. You learn that alone does not mean lonely.

You stop trying to control people, situations and outcomes. You learn to distinguish between guilt and responsibility and the importance of setting boundaries and learning to say NO.

You also stop working so hard at putting your feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring your needs.

You learn that your body really is your temple. You begin to care for it and treat it with respect. You begin to eat a balanced diet, drink more water, and take more time to exercise.

You learn that being tired fuels doubt, fear, and uncertainty and so you take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul. So you take more time to laugh and to play.

You learn that, for the most part, you get in life what you believe you deserve, and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

You learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for and that wishing for something to happen is different than working toward making it happen.

More importantly, you learn that in order to achieve success you need direction, discipline and perseverance. You also learn that no one can do it all alone, and that it’s OK to risk asking for help.

You learn the only thing you must truly fear is fear itself. You learn to step right into and through your fears because you know that whatever happens you can handle it and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on your own terms.

You learn to fight for your life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom.

You learn that life isn’t always fair, you don’t always get what you think you deserve and that sometimes bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people… and you learn not to always take it personally.

You learn that nobody’s punishing you and everything isn’t always somebody’s fault. It’s just life happening. You learn to admit when you are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.

You learn that negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected or they will suffocate the life out of you and poison the universe that surrounds you.

You learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower.

Then, you begin to take responsibility for yourself by yourself and you make yourself a promise to never betray yourself and to never, ever settle for less than your heart’s desire.

You make it a point to keep smiling, to keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

You hang a wind chime outside your window so you can listen to the wind.

Finally, with courage in your heart, you take a stand, you take a deep breath, and you begin to design the life you want to live as best you can.

I just have to share the amazing rainbows we've been experiencing this "winter." Every morning where I live here on Maui we are extremely blessed with morning rain -- morning mist -- is what I like to call it. A wonderful cleansing before the sun rises, making its way over the West Maui Mountains and shines its rays of light on the rest of the 'āina (land) extending out to the ocean.

Here are a few pictures that were all in the same day - - same morning in fact! Just right click on the image to view larger...

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Inspirations for cold(er) weather...









Quick Tangent:


The secret of contentment is leaning on God's grace...








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I can't even begin to count how many breathtaking rainbows we have had lately. I realize it has been a rainy tropical paradise the past couple weeks, but these beautiful gifts from the Lord illustrate He is listening, and is with us. I literally gasp when I see His promise in the sky, and my iPhone just doesn't give it justice. We have literally been in the rainbow and I feel so blessed to be surrounded by so much beauty in this very uncomfortable and insecure time.

One of many!!

It's been a tough couple weeks, and I appreciate the love, support, and continued prayer from everyone! I realize I have been vague as to what exactly is going on, but that is partly because I don't even really know what's going either! I also find it hard to write and publish the possibilities, and don't want to hypothesize anyway! I hope to report ecstatically good news soon -- until then, we pray! And boy do we pray. My family and I strongly believe in the power of prayer, and we definitely believe in Jesus' healing miracles and have faith in His will. We want Him to flex His healing muscles and glorify His name!  



While I am eager for answers to questions, I know everything is on His time, not my time. So I surrender it all, and walk by faith.


"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; And through the rivers, they will not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be scorched, Nor will the flame burn you. For I am the Lord your God." Isaiah 43:2–3 NASB

With God—chance is eliminated. God knows what is best. No struggle will come your way apart from His purpose, His presence, and His permission.

Isaiah 43:2 says, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you and through the rivers, they will not overflow you.”

What encouragement! You are never the victim of nature or the prey of fate. Chance is eliminated. You are more than a weather vane whipped about by the winds of fortune. Would God truly abandon you to the whims of drug-crazed thieves, greedy corporate raiders, or evil leaders? Perish the thought!

You live beneath the protective palm of a sovereign King who superintends every circumstance of your life, and delights in doing you good.

Remember this. Nothing comes your way that has not first passed through the filter of God’s love.

Source: Max Lucado Daily: Taking No Chances









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I just finished reading Facing Your Giants by Max Lucado, and cannot put into words how inspirational this book is. Max has a way with words to keep things short and sweet, and the pages are alive as each paragraph oozes scripture and deeper meaning. I think I mentioned in my Fearless recap Max teaches you so much regardless of where you are in your walk with the Lord -- not only does he cite and reference from the bible, but there is a Study Guide in the back to further the teachings and messages.

Facing Your Giants by Max Lucado is a David and Goliath story for everyday people referencing David's high's and low's in his lifetime and relating it to ours. I was only familiar with David's nine-foot-nine-inch adversary he struck down with a strip of leather and a pebble -- so this book opened my eyes in more ways than one, particularly in the life of David.

I honestly wish I could quote the entire book, but here is an excerpt from Chapter 19; Take Goliath Down!

"He vies for the bedside position, hoping to be the first voice you hear. He covets your waking  thoughts, those early, pillow-thoughts of stress. He awakes you with words of worry, stirs you with thoughts of stress. If you dread the day before you begin your day, mark it down, your giant has been by your bed.

And he's just getting warmed up. He breathes down your neck as you eat your breakfast, whispers in your ear as you walk out the door, shadows your steps, and sticks to your hip. He checks your calendar, reads your mail, and talks more trash than players in an inner-city basketball league. 

"You ain't got what it takes."
"You come from a long line of losers."
"Fold your cards and leave the table. You've been dealt a bad hand." 

He's your giant, your Goliath. Given half a chance, he'll turn your day into his Valley of Elah, taunting, teasing, boasting, and echoing claims from one hillside to the other. Remember how Goliath misbehaved? "For forty days, twice a day, morning and evening, the Philistine giant strutted in front of the Israelite army" (1 Sam. 17:16 NLT). 

Goliaths still roam our word. Debt. Diaster. Dialysis. Danger. Deceit. Disease. Depression. Super-size challenges still swagger and strut, still pilfer sleep and embezzle peace and liposuction joy. But they can't dominate you. You know how to deal with them. You face giants by facing God first.  

Focus on giants--you stumble.  

Focus on God--your giants tumble." 

There are so many other dog-eared pages I wanted to share, too, but I encourage you to pick this book up and read it when ever you can. I think the reason Max Lucado is my new favorite author is because he writes how he speaks, and throws in a laugh or two -- as if you're sitting in church with him on Sunday morning. While Fearless was my first Max book, and this is my second, the teachings in his books are timeless, and I wouldn't be surprised if I pick these books up again.


I want to thank each of you for sending good thoughts, vibes, and prayers my way -- my family and I are so grateful for the love and support, and truly believe in the power of prayer. Please keep them coming! Tomorrow is the day we find out some answers.

I want to close out this impromptu post with one last excerpt from Max Lucado's Facing Your Giants:

"David saw Goliath as a chance for God to show off! Did David know he would exit the battle alive? No. But he was willing to give his life for the reputation of God. 

What if you saw your giant in the same manner? Rather than begrudge him, welcome him. Your cancer is God's chance to flex his healing muscles. Your sin is God's opportunity to showcase grace. Your struggling marriage can billboard God's power. See your struggle as God's canvas. On it he will paint his multicolored supremacy."

In my Speechless Sunday #4 post I mentioned how worrying gives us something to do but gets us no where -- and how it is important to let go and let God ... I have been absolutely putting this into a conscious effort everyday, and while my journey and walk with the Lord is fruitful, I know there is so much more to learn.

My Dad is reading (or recently finished) Max Lucado's book, Fearless, and was blown away -- I know you will be to, so pick up both of these books -- and any book by Max for that matter. His stories truly inspire and spell out the teachings from the bible in a modern way.

I just started 3:16 The Numbers of Hope, and look forward to sharing my review of my third Max Lucado book soon!

Reference: Lucado, M. (2006). Facing Your Giants. Nashville, Tennessee: W. Publishing Group.

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Right Click to View Larger

Do you remember this post and how I said I knew in a blink of an eye, everything can change? 

Well. Everything did change.

I'm not sure if you noticed my absence, but I've pretty much been off the Internet since Tuesday. With out going into detail, me and my family had our world turned upside down on Tuesday. There are a lot of unknowns right now, and I hesitated even composing and publishing this post -- but I think my family and I could use all the prayers we can get. We especially need the Lord's healing hands, and His wonderful Grace fully enveloped around us. Tomorrow is a big day, and we should know more in the subsequent days. I believe my family is strong, and we have been rallying together since Tuesday, and are trying to be as proactive as we can be in this in-between and "theoretical" time.

I am physically and mentally exhausted, and have been praying with out ceasing. If you could pray, too, maybe, for His hedge of protection, His healing hands, and His strength to completely encompass us as we're facing this giant...we would be thankful.

The weather has been windy, rainy, and stormy, and as a result we've seen quite a few rainbows, even some double rainbows like the photo above. Rainbows make us stop in our tracks and remind us of His wonderful promise:



Update:
Guess what! Beth signed up with Rafflecopter and they sent her an invite already, so via Random.org the replacement winner is Nessa @ Island Style Living!! Congratulations girl!!







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I am a huge fan of music--so I thought I'd share a few songs I had on repeat this week! All of these songs can never be loud enough for me and make me want to start dancing, belt out a few notes--or both!













...And last but certainly not least!

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If you are a reader and haven't yet followed me via Google Friend Connect located on the top right of my Blog's Sidebar, please do so! Following, Subscribing, or commenting on my Blog is the biggest compliment you can give! 

I wanted to post this in case I don't get the chance to later, or even tomorrow, because tomorrow is a big day.

Please read Caitlin's blog post for details as she perfectly compiled the Who, What, When, Where, Why, and How regarding tomorrow's event... Spread the word, get involved, make a difference.

Prayer Changes Lives

If you are a reader and haven't yet followed me via Google Friend Connect located on the top right of my Blog's Sidebar, please do so! Following, Subscribing, or commenting on my Blog is the biggest compliment you can give!


Love,







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Can you imagine your life without fear? I can't really either, which is why I was so determined to read this book. This was my very first Max Lucado book, and well, "Hello new favorite author.."

Once I started reading, it was hard to put the book down. Max has a clear voice in his writing, and his words on paper seem to create a conversation as if you're chatting over coffee. He's funny, serious, and profound--his writing is definitely a God-given talent.

"Each sunrise seems to bring fresh reasons for fear." Isn't that the truth? I'm probably nothing short from being a worrywart, so I made it a point to digested every chapter of this packed with scripture, courage, faith, meat and potatoes book.

Fearless is a mixture of cross referencing real-life scenarios with spot-on analogies, stories, and encouragement from scripture relating to fear itself. You can tell Max is a Seasoned follower of Christ, for his knowledge of the written Word is so eloquently orchestrated with each chapter, analogy, and story, that it intentionally stands out to the reader--what you read hits so close to home.

Here is a few encouraging words from Jesus found in the first chapter of Fearless and later discussed in further detail;


"Do not fear those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul." Matthew 10:28


"Don't let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God, and trust also in me....I will come and get you, so that you will always be with me where I am." John 14:1, 3 NLT


"Take courage, son; your sins are forgiven." Matthew 9:2 NASB


He is always calling us to courage.






Max basically corrals our Maker's words of encouragement and strategically places it throughout his book, Fearless. After every chapter you build confidence, courage, and faith.

In the second chapter, I got chicken skin when I read:

"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows (Matt. 10:29-31 NIV)." (p. 23) 


Here's a paragraph from chapter three that bellowed deep:

"Fear, mismanaged, leads to sin. Sin leads to hiding. Since we've all sinned, we all hide, not in bushes, but in eighty-hour workweeks, temper tantrums, and religious busyness. We avoid contact with God." (p.35)


Ouch. Ain't that the truth? The point is, the closer we are to God, the further away our fears will naturally be.


Allow me to close, by sharing one last excerpt found in chapter four about worry accomplishing nothing...


"That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life--whether you have enough." Matthew 6:25 NLT


"Whether you have enough. Shortfalls and depletions inhabit our trails. Not enough time, luck, credit, wisdom, intelligence. We are running out of everything, it seems, and so we worry. But worry doesn't work."


"Look at the birds. They don't plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren't you far more valuable than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?" (vv. 26-27 NLT) (p.45)


Worrying accomplishes nothing. 


Those are just a few random excerpts through fourth chapter. Imagine how fed you will be after reading the book; my cup runneth over! 


So with the viral fear-induced world we live in today, fear of being sued, finishing last, going broke, the mole on the back, and the sound of the clock as it ticks us closer to the grave, I encourage you to read Fearless, as it truly will point you in the direction we are all striving for.

Give your worries to Jesus--when Christ is great, our fears are not. The longer we live in Him, the greater He becomes in us.

Free yourself from fear!

Let's pray, not panic.

PS: There is a discussion guide in the back of the book -- LOVE THAT! I actually didn't notice it until I was finishing chapter three or four, otherwise I would have completed it chapter by chapter. Not only is this discussion guide great on an individual level, but also for small group studies &/or weekly ministries you may be involved in etc.

About a year ago (probably two), my boyfriend's Mom gave me this book, The Shack--and I just finished it. Yes, it took me nearly two years to read it, for several reasons, which are not important. What I find as mind-blowing as the book, is the epic timing of when I finished this book to make the storyline that much more meaningful to me.

A lot has happened in two years.

A lot that was referenced in the book.

The other day, I was explaining some interesting events to my Mom and attempted to share how relevant the phrase timing is everything or there is a time and place for everything has always been in my life. When something is heavy on my heart for example, I will want to share it but I don't worry about when, because I know God will provide the perfect place and time for it.

First and foremost, this book is a fantastic read--I definitely encourage everyone to read this New York Times Bestseller. There have been over three million (10 million according to wikipedia!) copies printed for a reason; it's a great read.

Based out of Oregon, I was familiar with the areas mentioned and the writing was so detailed, I was able to vividly visualize everything as I hung on to every word, page by page. Fiction or non-fiction, your choice--this story is a phenomenal testimony for anyone struggling in their walk with the Lord. Life is tough, bad things happen to good people and it's easy to blame God, it's easy to have Great Sadness loom in your heart.

Roughly 10 months ago one of my close friends was in a horrific car crash, which should have ended his life. His 6'6" frame was crunched, crumpled, and coiled around metal and the remains of his car--it truly is a miracle he is alive.



He was unconscious and encountered several otherwise fatal injuries, and was literally put back together by the amazing Doctors at Emmanuel Hospital in Portland Oregon. If you read The Shack, you will understand the significance of this connection.

Prior to Accident

Cody is continuing to improve everyday, and since that video his speech has improved impeccably. When we talk on the phone, he sounds like his old self; however it is clear, he will forever be changed. I constantly pray and plead that the greater good for my friend is an eternal relationship with God and His son..


No one should experience the loss of a child, and my heart goes out to all who have. That heartbreaking experience is one of the main struggles in The Shack, and all I could think about were my dear friends who recently lost their only Daughter in a freak accident. Just over a month ago, their lives changed forever and although it might be too soon, I think this book would be perfect for them.


The depth of The Shack is brilliant. The writing is impressive. The accuracy and scriptural reference is flawless. I laughed and cried along the journey and found myself in awe most of the time, appreciating the perspectives. Whether you have a relationship with our Creator or not you will enjoy this book and grasp the relevancy appropriate at that time in your life.

Here's a couple excerpts from the book:

"Just because I work incredible good out of unspeakable tragedies doesn't mean I orchestrate the tragedies. Don't ever assume that my using something means I caused it or that I need it to accomplish my purposes. That will only lead you to false notions about me. Grace doesn't depend on suffering to exist, but where there is suffering you will find grace in many facets and colors." (p185)

"Lies are a fortress; inside them you can feel safe and powerful. Through your little fortress of lies you try to run your life and manipulate others. But the fortress needs walls, so you build some. These are the justifications for your lies." (p187)

There are so many more, I kind of wish there was a Study Guide at the end.


If you have the chance to read this book, I hope you enjoy it as much as I have. Kudo's to Mack Willie for putting his God-Given Talent to good use...Writing, and sharing the Truth.

William Paul Young | Author of The Shack

Visit The Shack Book website and join the Missy Project and hopefully this phenomenal book will birth into a movie!

TheShackBook.com

Today is my birthday, and it's just not a typical birthday. I'm lucky to be alive--and so is my Mom! For as long as I can remember I have always blown off my "Miracle Baby Story" as no big deal. However, after I read this blog post from my friend Cait, I was completely inspired, motivated, and on fire to get involved, and most of all, share my story.

Not quite 30 years ago, my Mom found out she was pregnant, yay! However, when her blood work came back she learned she was a "high-risk pregnancy" because of her Rh Factor and potential complications could come of this. Her doctor was concerned and wanted to perform an Amniocentesis to learn more about the baby, thinking I may have been breached, or worse, have Spina bifida. My Mom refused to have the Amniocentesis as she was adamant about having this baby (imwah!).. With or with out potential and scary complications new Mothers don't want to think about.

My Mom continued with her regular check-ups as usual, with no complications up until she thought her water broke at 24 weeks. The Doctors were able to stop the false labor; however it was then my Mom learned she had Placenta praevia.

She was then restricted to bed rest in the hospital for the remainder of her pregnancy and actually had two more false labors during this stay. She said this was when she starting writing, and she just wrote, and wrote...and wrote some more in spiral notebooks..

At 4:30 in the morning, and the beginning of week 27 of my Mom's pregnancy with me, I wanted OUT! The Doctors couldn't stop this labor like the first few times, and my stubborn personality was already shining through. The Doctors immediately prepared for a C-Section because of the Placenta praevia, but on the way they saw my head crowning!

My Mom was struggling with a lot of issues herself, and almost passed out from shock, but still pushed, and pushed, and PUSHED, as they coached her through what ended up being a successful labor. At 6:12AM I came barreling into this world and my vulnerability was immediately tended to.

Born in week 27, at a whopping 2lbs, 7oz, and 16in, I stayed in an incubator with my eyes covered under a bili light.

Unfortunately Mom and Dad couldn't touch me because my skin was so thin, it would sting otherwise, and couldn't keep me warm quite yet. I had no gag refluxes, and was fed through a tube down my throat. I had roughly, a 10% chance of surviving and all my Parents could do was read my chart..

I was progressing everyday, though, and gained weight collectively as the days passed. About three weeks later I was able to transfer from the Children's Hospital back to my Mom's regular hospital where I no longer needed to be in an incubator, could breath natural air on my own, and gained my gag refluxes.

The Doctors were amazed, as my lunges, and eyes, and ears, and everything else was perfectly fine. I had all ten fingers, and all ten toes, with no deformities. It was a miracle. My Mom said she could see Heaven in my vibrant big blue eyes, and even today, calls me her Miracle Baby:)

When I finally reached 3lbs, I was released to go home as all I needed at this point was love from my family. My Parents were astonished at this incredible news, and were scared to take such a small person home with them!

All I did was sleep and snuggle with Mom and Dad though--they even had to wake me up to feed me!

I was off the charts until I reached 9 months old...

My birthday is today, June 29th; however, my birthday was supposed to be August 23rd. A full term pregnancy is 37+ weeks, and I was born at 27 weeks.. back in the 80's, this truly is a miracle that I made it. ..Now I'm a very healthy 20-something year old!

Before & After          4-Weeks                20-Something

The March of Dimes Organization, which was founded in 1938, strives to improve the health of babies, by preventing birth defects, premature birth, and infant mortality. 1 in 8 babies are born prematurely, and have a chance to survive with the ongoing research and support of this organization.

I recently participated in my very first March For Babies event back in April (because of Cait!), and as a preemie success story, I am so thankful for this organization, the volunteers involved, and the people who donate, giving opportunity for future preemie success stories--which is really the best gift any parent can hope for when experiencing a high-risk pregnancy or premature birth.

To learn more, find an event, donate or set up a fundraising page, click here or here, and start asking friends and family to join you and have fun Marching For Babies! The improvements over the years have saved lives, and continue to do so with people like you.

Do you have a special Birthday story?
Were you a Preemie?
Is today your Birthday, too?!

Day 13 of 30

in·se·cu·ri·ty   
[in-si-kyoor-i-tee]
–noun, plural -ties.

1. lack of confidence or assurance; self-doubt: He is plagued by insecurity.
2. the quality or state of being insecure; instability: the insecurity of her financial position.
3. something insecure: the many insecurities of life.

A photo of your biggest insecurity

I am a woman living in a convoluted and judgmental society where both men and women can be the enemy. However, more often than not we are our own nemesis when we should be our very own best friend. Why are we so critical of ourselves? Why is human nature so mean? Where did this warped mentality come from?

I am an assertive, confident, independent woman. Of course I have insecurities, now more than ever it seems; but to spot light them? No thanks. It feels like I'd be dwelling in negativity, which leads to a pity-party.

Most women's biggest insecurity is their appearance. And even though I am comfortable with who I am--wouldn't want to be anybody else, that is still my biggest insecurity. Even when I was in the best shape of my life, I was modest and *cringe* compared myself to others..



Body Image
Fat Talk and Negative Self-Talk
Photoshopping and False Imagery
The Objectification of Women in Advertising
Vanity Sizing (Great post by Lauren @TeamGiles)
Mixed Messages in Fitness Magazines
Self-Esteem and Self-Worth
The Thin Ideal vs. The Healthy Ideal
A Healthy Balance

The above mentioned topics are huge issues and a vicious circle..

Let's End It.



You are Good Enough. 

The goal of Caitlin's Operation Beautiful is to end negative self-talk or “Fat Talk.” If this small movement only does one productive thing, the hope is that it helps people realize how truly toxic negative self-talk is—it hurts you emotionally, spiritually, and physically.

Join the movement. 

We all have our good days and our bad days, and thankfully we've all become part of an encouraging community of intelligent, healthy, and motivating bloggers. Personally, I have been in a fitness rut for what seems like a couple years and am finally returning to my old ways.. Thanks to the amazing blogs I follow and the brilliant writers behind them I am getting to where I want to be again. Thanks for the motivation everyone:)

Have you every heard of Operation Beautiful?
Have you ever seen an Operation Beautiful note?
Have you ever left an Operation Beautiful note? 

I had never heard of Operation Beautiful until I stumbled across Caitlin's blog on April Fool's Day... She posted the funniest blog-post/April Fool's joke I had ever seen & snooped around her blog eventually learning about OB. I think it is a genius idea, and although I've never seen any OB notes yet, I have all the intentions of posting them myself:)

You Are Beautiful!



Enter My First Giveaway for your chance to win some sweet Hawaiian goodies from Paradise:)

And

Help me reach my goal by this Saturday...

        Help Save A Life | Please Donate


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